Healing Lance (A Warrior's Redemption 1) Page 17

  He took a deep breath. “Yes.”

  She smiled softly. “Humans are not perfect and none of the gods expect us to be. We do the best we can. It is not only our actions that are judged but our intent. I see you grieve for the life you took.”

  Gust lowered his gaze to the ground and nodded. “He was a danger to us. He’d probably done horrible things and yet….”

  “And yet,” she said gently. “It is ultimately Osys and Mawn who will judge us. All I can tell you is to keep your intentions and your heart pure and good, and you will always be on the right side of Anknet. For, remember, Anknet is also the goddess of death. She gives and she takes, all things are in balance in her eyes.”

  Gust nodded and met her gaze, a weight lifting off his shoulders. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” She knelt and continued with her task. He wanted to offer something to Anknet but he had nothing with him. He set down the tent and laid the tunic on top of it before pulling out his knife. He untied his hair and held one of his braids straight out and sliced through it. He then laid the braided lock of hair on one of the painted rocks at the base of the steps that led inside.

  The priestess caught his eye and nodded in approval.

  “You should expect more offerings in the coming days. I don’t know if any of the council has spoken to you yet, but we expect Ulfr Blackwolf, the sea wolf of Grekenus, to be coming here soon. He’s after Lance. The rider of Brutus.”

  Mandissa nodded. “Rabia told me right before you arrived. Take heart. I feel that this is fated. Lance and Brutus’s arrival, your friendship, and now Ulfr. It has the hand of the gods in it.”

  Gust frowned. “For what purpose?”

  “We shall see.”

  Now uneasy for a different reason than before, Gust returned the knife to his belt and gathered his things. What possible reason could the gods have to bring Lance to them? It did nothing but put them in danger. He couldn’t easily doubt a priestess, and yet he couldn’t put his mind to seeing recent events objectively.

  He shook his head and thought of what Mandissa told him of his previous predicament. Yes, the gods knew what were in all their hearts. If he killed out of rage or vengeance, he’d be leaning toward Snet or usurping Osys, and he didn’t want that. But there was no way he would ever forgive or forget the murder of his parents.

  He shook his head again, trying to clear it. Dwelling would not help him reach any goal. Such a path only led to madness.

  It wasn’t hard to find Lance. Gust simply followed Brutus’s tracks, and they led him directly to the river. He stopped at the top of the slope and looked down. His eyes widened and he nearly dropped the saddle. Lance was naked and he’d pulled his blond hair over one shoulder, revealing his corded neck and strong back, as well as his healing wounds. The sun shone off his glistening skin, indicating he’d washed himself. A few old scars shone under the light, illustrating the brutality of his life. There didn’t seem to be any part of him untouched by violence.

  Poor, strong man.

  Lance crouched at the edge of the river, scrubbing harshly at the tunic, the blood briefly turning the water red. Brutus stood upstream, drinking and flicking his tail. Gust swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry. Yes, he’d seen Lance naked and had even washed his more intimate areas but that was when he was a patient and severely wounded, and Gust only his healer.

  Gust closed his eyes tightly and shook his head. His body stirred as his skin heated, and his cock pressed against his breeches. Stop it. He was thankful Lance was so intent on his task and that gave Gust time to regain his control. He took a deep breath to steady himself before shuffling down the slope.

  “Lance.”

  Lance partially turned and looked over his shoulder. He smiled without a trace of embarrassment or even acknowledgement that he was naked.

  “I have that tunic and your other items,” Gust said. He determinedly stared at Lance’s face and only his face. “And a tent just in case it rains.”

  Lance’s smile broadened as he stood. Gust swallowed hard.

  “Thank you.”

  Gust gratefully set the items down as Lance walked toward him, carrying his soaked tunic. Gust slipped behind him and scrutinized the four claw marks. Two of the slices were red with irritation but none were torn, and there wasn’t any sign of infection. Lance stood quietly as Gust thoroughly checked every single slice. It was an intense struggle to stay focused and not admire Lance’s tight ass and his sturdy legs.

  When Gust determined that Lance was in fine shape he stepped back. “You’ll do,” he said with a slight smile.

  Lance snorted and dropped the soaked tunic before grabbing the clean one lying on the tent next to them.

  “My aunt would prefer it if you didn’t return to the healing hut. If you need something from there, I’ll bring it.”

  Lance furrowed his brows. “I understand.”

  Brutus trotted over and bumped his nose against Gust’s shoulder. Chuckling, Gust turned and rubbed his nose. Out of the corner of his eye, he noted that Lance dressed, tugging on the dry tunic and yanking up his breeches. Gust was alternately relieved and disappointed. He certainly had a shapely ass.

  “I realize I should have brought food,” Gust said when he turned back to Lance. “I’m sorry.”

  Lance waved away his apology. “You give me plenty, Gust. I’m fine for now.” His stomach chose that moment to growl and Lance appeared sheepish.

  Gust chuckled again. “I’ll bring you something. The weather should be mild so I don’t think you’ll need a blanket. I’ll keep an eye on the skies, though.”

  “You’re a good friend.”

  Gust’s smile was genuine this time. “I try to be.”

  “I want to be a good friend to you.”

  Gust gripped Lance’s arm. “You are. Remember the bear? And Dakar?”

  Lance appeared to hesitate before touching Gust’s hand. “Have you, I mean, was that the first time you…?”

  Gust frowned. “What?”

  Lance winced. “Killed someone?”

  Gust ducked his head.

  Lance sighed. “I’m sorry. You killed because of me.”

  “I made the choice with my eyes wide open.” Gust met Lance’s gaze. “I don’t regret it. You’re alive.”

  “But you’re a healer.” Lance appeared quite distressed.

  “Yes, I am, and I protected you.”

  “I’m supposed to protect you.”

  “Which you can’t do if you’re dead.”

  They stared at each other stubbornly. Gust sighed and broke eye contact first. He patted Lance’s arm and stepped back.

  “I spoke to the priestess that cares for the temple. I promise that I’m all right.”

  Lance squinted, assessing him. He must have seen Gust’s sincerity and nodded.

  “Do you remember your first—wait, never mind.” Gust mentally kicked himself. He didn’t want to know. Despite Lance’s knowledge of Ulfr and Scourge, Gust didn’t want to question him. He didn’t want to have that brutality lay over their friendship like a blade ready to fall.

  Lance’s entire expression fell, and he turned his gaze to the river. His eyes went unfocused. “I remember the first person I killed.”

  “I’m sorry. I had no right to pry.”

  “She betrayed Ulfr,” he continued, as if not hearing Gust. “I don’t remember her crimes. All I remember is standing in front of her as a child, holding a dagger.”

  Gust’s insides froze and his heart pounded like a drum.

  Lance focused on the ground. “I didn’t hesitate. Ulfr told me to kill her and I did. I sliced her throat, and I felt nothing as her blood pooled on the ground.”

  Sickened, Gust turned away and pressed his face into Brutus’s neck.

  “I feel now,” Lance whispered. He clenched his hands into fists and when their gazes met, Gust was heartened to see the fire and stubbornness in his gaze. “I am not his weapon any longer. I will end him.”

 
; Gust reached out and gripped both of Lance’s hands, gently loosening his fists until they stood with fingers entwined.

  “I believe you,” Gust said.

  Lance swallowed hard and nodded, exhaustion replacing the fire in his eyes.

  “Why don’t I go get some food and then you can take a nap?”

  Lance nodded, eyes unfocused again.

  Gust let go and stepped away only to turn back. “I just have to say that after watching you defeat Ragel, I doubt Hoksys himself is better with a sword then you are.”

  Lance slowly smiled, giving Gust exactly what he was aiming for. Pink rose to his cheeks and, as if suddenly shy, Lance looked down at the ground again and shuffled his bare feet over the muddy bank.

  “Thanks,” he whispered.

  Gust snorted and continued on his way to get some food for his friend.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Lance was thrilled that Gust was still his friend. Gust was so kind and sweet and strong. So very strong. Despite his haunted eyes, Gust’s force of will was awe-inspiring. Lance still felt guilty for causing Gust to go against his oath but he knew that despite being a healer, Gust had a warrior’s spirit. He would stand proudly on his own.

  Though, the majority of his guilt was reserved for the deception about his true identity. He would help this town prepare for a fight with Ulfr, but what would they do if they knew they had Scourge on their side? Hang him, probably. To protect them and everyone, he had to lie. He had to lie to Gust. It bothered him.

  After finally eating and then taking a nap, he’d spent the afternoon with Sheriff Kafele, who treated him differently. He was still course and brisk while his initial hostility toward Lance was no longer present. Lance shared all he could about Ulfr and his tactics, and as well as what he could about Scourge, watching his words the entire time. He’d tried to reassure the sheriff and anyone who listened that Scourge was also just a man in black armor.

  Evening had rolled around swiftly and then night, and he hadn’t seen Gust again. He wasn’t worried. He knew his healer was busy with his own preparations.

  The night was clear and cool, and Brutus lay next to him, radiating warmth. He slept contently in the unplowed field, the hard ground familiar. Though Lance had yet to sleep as peacefully as he did with Gust by his side, he managed to avoid dreams that night. He considered it a victory considering all that happened since arriving in Thebys, with Ragel, the townspeople, the bear, and Gust’s tours. Plus the festival with all the grand stories and songs.

  Training began the next morning. The first group consisted of the sheriff’s deputies. There were twenty of them, mostly men but with a few sturdy women among the bunch. They demonstrated what they knew before he gave them a few more pointers. Sheriff Kafele conducted the brunt of the training while Lance watched. He was often called to give a few demonstrations. He didn’t want to impress the sheriff, not exactly, although he definitely wanted to earn some trust. Gust was on his side, thank the gods, but what of the others?

  Lance explained Ulfr’s methods and revealed secrets, hoping to give them the advantage. A few of the council members stopped by to watch and a few even ask him questions. They made him uncomfortable, and he forced himself to meet their eyes and reply honestly. When they asked about Scourge, he couldn’t help but hesitate. He told them that Scourge was set apart from the others, isolated, his identity shrouded in mystery. It was partly true.

  Thank the gods Gust stayed right by his side through it all with suggestions or comments. He didn’t want to train anyone the way Ulfr had trained him—through blood, pain, and fear, so he was glad that the sheriff was taking such an active part.

  When the afternoon session began, he realized quickly they were working with people who’d never wielded a proper weapon in their lives. The farmers appeared more competent than the others since they at least knew how to hold tools and pace themselves. After a discussion with Gust and the sheriff, Lance suggested they start with axes since most people either knew how to wield or were familiar with an axe for mundane tasks. It didn’t take much to turn their minds to battle. Swords took more skill, and he quickly determined many weren’t skilled enough to wield one.

  The first day past swiftly, and the evening was lonely since Gust was called away to his healing duties. Lance didn’t begrudge it at all. He admired, respected, and was in complete awe of Gust’s dedication and comforting nature. It was so different from the warriors he’d grown up around. In fact, Sheriff Kafele felt more familiar than Gust. Thankfully the sheriff was controlled and disciplined, not erratic in his aggression as others he’d known.

  “You did good,” the sheriff had said before they parted ways.

  “Oh. Uh. Thank you.”

  “Join me at the tavern.”

  “Uh—”

  The sheriff took his arm and led the way. They didn’t talk and Lance found himself relaxing into the silence. He ate the food the sheriff ordered, grateful to be supplied. He didn’t know where he’d get coin to pay for necessary items once he left Thebys. His heart grew heavy at the thought.

  After they parted ways, Lance returned to the field and lay back on the grass, Brutus at his side. He folded his arms under his head and stared at the stars. They twinkled prettily and he smiled. He thought how nice it would be to settle in Thebys. It was foolish thinking, and yet there was no harm in fantasizing, was there? Gust told him to imagine and wish, to embrace his newly found freedom. What if he did live here? What if he could own a small cottage and maybe learn to be a blacksmith? Or maybe breed horses. Or maybe he could become one of the sheriff’s deputies. Then he could see Gust every day.

  Lance rolled on his side and looked up at Brutus. “What would you think about living here?”

  Brutus lifted his head and eyed him before snorting. He shook his head and flicked his tail.

  Lance chuckled. “Yeah, I know. You don’t want to settle. You’d be bored out of your mind here.” And maybe I would be as well.

  Lance sighed and closed his eyes. Brutus nuzzled his face before settling down once again. Lance laid contently near Brutus before letting himself fall asleep.

  The next morning passed swiftly with Lance watching Gust more than he meant to. Despite devoting himself to Anknet, Gust appeared quite eager to learn how to handle a sword. Lance hoped Gust didn’t end up regretting his choice. His dark skin shone with sweat under the sun’s rays, the clear days offering no protection from the heat. Lance liked watching him train and sweat. He was so damn pretty.

  It was during those moments of distraction that the tingling in his groin was accompanied by other funny sensations. His stomach would knot, and he felt flushed as if he had a fever. He didn’t know what it could be. He knew he wasn’t ill. The malaise would come and go and never progress beyond discomfort.

  When they broke midday for rest and food, Lance whistled for Brutus as Gust walked toward him. With a joyful whinny, Brutus trotted up to them and bumped Lance in the face with his nose. He was sure Brutus was amused by these silly humans.

  Gust chuckled and stroked Brutus’s neck. “I’ve been meaning to talk with you about something. The priestess said that Brutus was divine. Is that true?”

  “Maged said something about that at the meeting a few days ago. What is it?”

  Gust raised his brow. “You’ve never heard of divine animals?”

  Lance shook his head.

  “Divine animals are the children of Batsa. She favors horses and cats. Some of the divine animals mated with average ones, creating strong bloodlines. Do you think Brutus could have such a bloodline?”

  Lance frowned in thought and stroked Brutus’s nose. “Maybe. I don’t know. I just know there are no other horses like him.”

  Brutus snorted in agreement and laid his head over Lance’s shoulder, hugging him. Lance smiled and closed his eyes, embracing his best friend. Maged’s words had certainly confused him. Blessed by the gods? He wasn’t so sure about that. Brutus was a blessing, certainly—the first creat
ure to ever earn his affection and trust. Without Brutus he doubted his heart would have been soft enough to recognize the beauty of the baby girl.

  Certainly, he was always safe on Brutus’s back. His horse had carried him for days despite his wounds and somehow led him to the perfect place and people who could heal him. Strange things did occur around Brutus, and all other horses seemed to defer to his authority.

  Lance pulled back just enough to meet Brutus’s dark eye. He knew he didn’t mistake the amused glint in his pupil. Lance swallowed hard and straightened.

  “How did you two find each other?” Gust asked, his expression warm and soft. “I know I asked that before but I never got an answer. Such a rude bear.”

  Lance smiled slightly. “Ulfr wanted Brutus for his own. He bought him as a colt and planned to train him into the perfect warhorse.” Lance curled his fingers into a fist even as Brutus stamped the ground, kicking up dirt in agitation. “I was barely out of childhood when I saw Brutus and thought him the most beautiful beast I’d ever seen. I would sneak out at night to the corral and speak to him. He ignored me at first. I wasn’t worthy enough, was I, boy?”

  Brutus whinnied softly and mouthed his hair in affection.

  Lance chuckled. “Ulfr was cruel to him and instead of being afraid Brutus became angry. He fought back. When he was old enough to break, he never allowed anyone on his back. He flung away anyone that tried. Until one night, he invited me. Ulfr was certainly surprised when he woke up and saw me on his prized stallion, riding through the camp.”

  Gust shook his head with a look of wonder. “I’m surprised he didn’t kill both of you.”

  Lance fell silent. He pressed his forehead to Brutus’s neck. “We were useful tools. He would have considered that a waste of good weapons.”

  Gust moved closer and wrapped an arm around his waist, pressing against his side.

  “I’m sorry for what you’ve had to endure. Remember you are free, Lance. Both you and Brutus. You have a wide open future ahead of you.”

  Brutus mouthed one of Gust’s braids and tugged gently, swishing his tail. Gust chuckled and patted his nose. Warmth flooded Lance’s insides at the interaction. It was a relief to know how much Brutus liked Gust. He wrapped his arm around Gust’s waist in return and squeezed. Gust turned his face and their noses nearly bumped. Gust’s eyes widened and his breathing sped up. Lance felt his heart race, unsure why. He felt funny again and his stomach cramped.